writing helped me thru my weird, darkest times when i was hopeless, helpless and was too embarrassed to ask for help. it was thru writing dat i was able to built a bridge make of reckless and poisonous tots to a place dat brought me to the ppl who (used to be strangers the but) means a lot to me now. or less, maybe.
i remember i rambled a lot and little did i know, there were ppl out there fell in love wit every harsh words written in fears and insecurities. and these few special ppl managed to grab me out of dreadful tots and made me realized of so many thgs dat i shld feel lucky for. they think dat my deep passion about emotions r rather fascinating than a burden for them to help wit. my past failures has brought me to a world full of hopes and chances.
those were the days.
i miss writing a lot of honest tots when i was in the state of feelin down in deep shyte - the feelin off the cliff into a pool of negativity. but nthg can ever compare to the feelin of bein content towards everythg. u knw - to wake up everyday expecting sthg greatis about to happen, to love wat ur doin and doin wat u love, to find peace when ur alone, to feel someone's love when they r worried sick about u - those kinda thang dat u'll tend to overlook when ur way too bz wit ur own shyte in the head, and bein too bz bein a slave to ur own tot and sadness.
i miss writing wit the true heart in it, dat i din fake the whole feelin towards it. i miss writing w'out hav to think about 'wat if..' but to the tot of ventilating thgs out of myself dat matters.
however, i'm still grasping for inspirations to write down the way i used to - becoz writing anythg dat's related to happiness is pretty hard for me. and dat's y u hardly see i do writing for sometime - and today, i started to write again. i mean - it is hard to relate urself when ur happy, when u used to write about anger,depressed tot most of the time.
i knw i havent been updating as frequent as i used to - but trust me, i've been meaning to find the right time and inspirations to do so. still, i failed too, many times. i realised dat my love towards writing and the whole idea about blogging had never die.
they jst faded away but they r still there - holding a rebel inside of me to set free thru the tips of my fingers.