i slapped a stdnt in my class ystrday morning. not dat i want to. but i did it. and i felt bad wit the whole shyte.
i came to work wit so many thgs atas meja aku - memos, letters, surats, asgments and such. and i think i cld take some time to settle wit thgs. but then aku terkejut bila Yus tanya 'ko kelas wat time ari ni Shah', and i was like - mana edaran jadual? kenapa aku tak dpt and such? fuck it, as usual. the penyelaras will do the jadual, amendment, tp tak buat edaran properly. kelas aku at 2pm. aku tarik nafas lega a bit.
but bila Shahrizan called, mtk aku relief kelas Fadil since dia EL - aku dah contemplating. aku mls, tsuara pun tadak. tp ada benda lagik aku nak catch up dgn budak2 neh.. so aku decided to go in. at 9am, aku masuk kelas - imagine, covering someone's else class, suara tak dak, cuma berbekalkan kehendak nak mengajar and cover topik budak2 neh. w'pun payah giler nak mengajar while suara ko basically mcm org nak beranak, and the stdnts were ok wit dat.
till aku walked to the back - aku saw dis one guy, sitting there, doing nthg. nthg at all. no notes, no nthg. he was jst literally sit there. when i asked him, he told me he did not bring my notes. ok lah - sebab kelas ganti je kot.bila aku tanya did u take down any notes, anythg at all - he said, no. he did not bring anythg to the class. and aku slapped him on the cheek. hurmm..
and aku shoo-ed everybdy out of the class, for a break,
aku came back to the ofc, wit the so-called numb feeling. lama dah aku tak buat hal mcm ni, but today - i did. perhaps aku stress. serabut. i think i am. perhaps i am teaching em a lil bit of leasson - but dat was not me. i dun believe in dat any longer. so i called the stdnt up to see me in the ofc. we had a chat. dia mintak maaf for his wrong doing and explained the whole shyte. bertambahlah rasa bersalah aku. how cld i jumped and took such action w/out further thinkin? i knw wat ever the reason was - it did not grant me to act dat way. seriously.
aku ended up mintak maaf as well to the stdnt. w'pun he said no, it aint my fault - i still do.
smlm last day Amer in the ofc. he'll be goin off for his full time research-based master in UPM. kinda miss his presence. kalo tak - dia la yg paling awal akan greet aku early in the morn., and will definitely came by and asked 'ko ada kelas ke ari ni Shah?', like everyday.
i remember i dun really like him dat much earlier on. Amer can be seen as someone yg a lil bit arrogant, a lil too big headed. but as the time went by - i started to see the different side of him. he's not arrogant, or a lil too big headed watever dat is - he loves to stand his on stance, point out his point well - wit facts and such. and dat amazed me. he's good bila bersembang pasal2 benda2 yg dia suka - somethg matured, critically kinda discussion - he's so into it. and he is also kinda guy yg bley go on well when it comes to small talk, sembang2 lagho. dia jenis kwn tak pernah berkira dgn kwn2, he willing to giv all dat he had for kwn2 - masa, effort et al.
and aku startedto learn kuar mkn pg dgn dia, pekena sepam dua, vent out and balik masuk ofc and work well.
now - aku sorg je kat level neh. i mean - not literally lah. ofkoz ada Mr V, Ramesh, Karu et al. tp tu lah.. Abg Din pun ada - tp dia sibuk giler. sgt2 sibuk u hardly see him even once a week pun kat tempat dia. kalo ada pun, dia bergegas2 kinda thang. sigh.
and ye lah - ada Fina, Yus etc. tp dorg pempuan. unless aku nak kena gossip dat wld be sthg else. hahaha
and semlm - bdk2 Sem 1 bought him a huge kek, yg basically kitorg2 je yg tolong habiskan. erm, 2 yrs is a long time. anythg can happen in between. but as a fren - aku wish him the best lah. all the very best in the whole for him. pergi, and balik wit ur Master.
jgn balik bwk bini baru sudeh. hahaha