Saturday, June 7, 2014

failed. so?

markah all the tugasan dah keluar. member2 satu course aku sibuk do discuss regarding it in WhatsApp Group. tensed, dats how i feel. i am not kinda guy yg tau je results dah keluar - trus serbu and go sawan wanting to knw it well. aku malas. especially aku dah bley agak how and wat. 

but these boys and gals - they r fillin up my life wit misery wit notifications and such - dok berbincang about results. duh.

and to be frank - i got no-A for my first assignment on my previous, earlier assignment. kerja last minit - watdya expect? kalo ko nak aku list down all the excuses and such - damn i am good at it, trust me. i dun  knw which one is more pathetic - the fact dat all my classmates got averagely higher than me - or dat the fact i am astoundingly happy by theresult. and frankly, at dis pint of my life, i cldnt giv a fcuk of others results.

ye ke? haih.

as my 40 tips for a better life states - #23. dun compare ur life to others. u hav no idea wat their journey is all about.

on a happier note, i am happy i finally hav a subject i do not failed at. hahaha yay for the ol'me! fallin is not fun i am tellin u. especially when it is twice, consecutively, but move on yes we shld, and by dat i mean i hav to re-sit for the papers. kan? senang la ckp, fail is good.. and such. so bye-bye semester break, and hello hell of wonderful knowledge. 


all dis failing and low grades experiences (and is yet to end) teach me one thg, dat ppl r strong and r able to move on. every sem when the new subject/module started, i see numerous repeaters/extenders. they extend a sem or even a year, and dat is a lot of sacrifice i am tellin u. ko kerja, ko study at the same time. hell dat aint easy.

so i tot to myself, last time when i failed - i felt down in a slump. i beat myself over it, i cant begin to think to lice in a world where i cant pass or well, failed! i tot it mght be a sign dat dis is not for me - i hav to do somethg else. but when the second one hit, i was thrown down and fell hard, i really considered to jst stop altogether alrdy.

but then i realize dat, when i went over to the board i see a lot of ppl got the same shyte, worse even. and i saw how they coping up, darn they r fine, they r courageous ppl. and after a series of pep talk from some films and idiotbox shows, u think i hav to move on. sure, i failed. so wat? it do not pass me yet, but i hav to look into the future. kan?

failing, fighting, loathing, overeating, makin gemuk and every trouble in the world, i realized - is jst a bump dat will surpass eventually. 

they r colors dat stays, meanwhile happy times jst fade away.

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