ok. esk aku pakai wig.
and now u knw dat stdnts is really paying attention - to every single details of u. erm, and stimes u wish kan bagus kalo dlm kelas, they'll give the same attention to the lesson taught. eh? but seriously - they do. jam yg ko pakai, kasut, ur baju baru or not, tie tak match, ko pakai spek tak pakai spek, janggut misai jambang bagai.
including ko nye zip. ofkoz.
seriously, sometimes it makes u feel good. knwing dat there r ppl out there is paying attention. ur presence and such. i think dats normal. most of u r like dat - no matter how hard ur tryin to deny it. but deep in u, it is. up to a point u ended bein so meticulous about everythg - for ur scared to be magnified, for sure.
and seriously - sometimes u start to feel kinda suffocate. ko pecut dgn scoot kat jalan yg bz pakai round neck, suar bwh lutut, selipar Jepun and tak berhelmet - ko tunggu la, jap lagi akan smpai WhatsApp sayin, 'eh, sy nampak sir!!'. and dats wat happened to me, smlm. ha ha..
no, its not funny.
is dat a problem? no. i took it lightly. aku dulu pun mcm tu - at dat particular stage of age - u tend to look up for someone and such, and u like to see watever u like to see - and u ended up wit some kinda perception. u knw - role model and such. i am not saying dat i am good, dat u hav to look up to me. no. but dis is somethg dat u hav to pay, a price to pay - being u urself, doing wat u do, and being force to be under a kanta pembesar. dan, i hope i wont look way way gemuk dr biasa, eh? hahaha.. i mean, i got no prob at all. i believe in myself. i am wat i am, and i'll be wat i shld be. u can judge me, i dun mind. u can like wat u see, or choose to hate it as well. coz i hav no problem at all.
coz if u do - may be ko yg bermasalah. eh? bukan aku.
tadak misai bkn masalah. hahaha.. aku yg bermasalah sebnrnya. knwing yg aku mmg jahil dlm bab2 trim janggut misai neh, tp still nak mengadap cermin, pegang shaver. ended up (as usual) misai tobek, and aku kena pecut naik scoot (tak sempat berhelmet) pi barber and get rid of it. trust me - 3 4 hari lagi, there'll be more in between lubang idung and mulut aku, for sure.
at least a jgk stdnt pempuan tegur aku and went like, 'sir, u look young!'. and me, being me - my first reaction was like, 'heh. ayat!'.
and i laughed away.