i knw, its the end of 2013. within coupla hrs from now - 2013 will jst a history. and ere we go - 2014 is in. and within coupla hrs from now, as well - thgs goin to be chaotic, bising wit screaming ppl, fireworks and such. before thgs will get back to usual - few hrs after dat - and the rest of the life will go on, as usual.
i wont be doin a flash back, or watsoever. as for me - 2013 is kinda tough for me. leaving me wit so many thgs to remember, and it has changed my life, my whole life dat is. thgs r not goin to be the same, and i gez theres no use of lookin back. i was bz, so bz throughout dis year - wit work, life, struggling wit thgs, future. i was happy - i felt like havin the whole world for myself, dat all my dreams finally came true - before suddenly some unexpected thgs turned up; and the whole thg, i mean - the whole dreams, hopes, everythg shattered into pieces. i was sad, i was so down like never before. i was torn apart - until i realised dat even if i cry shyte out - thgs jst not goin to be the same again. until i realised dat - i gotta stand up, and move on wit life - and take thgs as it is.
u never knw how it is - when all ur dreams, ur wish, ur hopes - were rite there in ur hand, and it was like jst an inch away to make it real - and suddenly u gotta back off, forget the whole thang. completely. u wanna go wit it still, but u jst cant. and u gotta decide between the two, while both of the decision will hurt u tremendously.
now - wit dis 2014 real soon - frankly speakin; i dun really hav dreams to dream on. perhaps i gotta try my very best to prove dat i am worth a while, and thgs will at least - will get better. works r gettin harder, life is gettin tougher. and me - i gotta no choice but to move on.
and deep inside of me - i still havin question of "y me?". and i knw - it will never hav the answer.
but havin all dat - i am not sayin dat i am givin up. i am not. as long as i am standin tall, as long as i am breathin alrite - i wont giv up. not a bit. i still hav dreams to catch.
and i still hav a life, to live.
owh, btw - ok, dis is the cliché part. i wish u Happy New Year. its 2014, mind u. i wish u all the very best in dis whole wide world. i wish dat all ur dream, all ur hope will come true in days to come. in year to come -to be precise.
and i need u to wish me the same, too. to pray the very best for me, at least.
HAPPY 2014, guys!
and owh, for the new year eve? i jst stay home. cooked for myself, hav the whole sup sayur indront of the idiotbox - a movie after another. no, i wont be goin out for i never do so, and i am not kinda guy to be pushed around in the crowd while i can hav all the space to myself, at my own ease, at home.
haih. all the mercun dah berbunyi. u hav a good year ahead, peeps!