lama jugak dah aku tak tulis anythg in ere. Ramadhan dah nak abes pun. aku remember the last time aku wrote was like nearly 2weeks back. i think. and yeah - Ramadhan dah comes to the end. within coupla days - dah raya. and aku - jst like dat, nthg much. as aku said it before - i dun really hav the urge to raya pun. for some reasons, perhaps.
called ngah tadik. mak still at ngah's. tunggu Soleh balik dr acik's, and terus ke Kubu Gajah. kak yang and fmly dah ada kat ngah's, i cld hear budak2 terjerit2 terkejar2 main at the background. rasa tak sbr plak nak balik kg. the fact is - hari raya, dis time around is purely for family gathering je la, nthg much. abah no longer around. and thgs r not the same anymore.
so many thgs aku nak kongsi. tp - mcm biasak.. dah lama tak tulis, u tend to hav thgs beku in ur head. and when u wanted to let it out - u dun knw if its relevant anymore. then again - u knw u gotta let it out, for if its there for a long time - it wldnt be good for me.
thgs changed around me. i knw - nbdy wants to change. ppl hate changes. and i gez - i am, as well. i dun mean to be slefish ke aper.. tp dats the way it is. if it is changes for good, betterment - i gez it'd be alrite. but if it is not - aku not sure how to react. thgs change, ppl change. even ur best fren do. i gez - dats the way life is. sometimes - u tend to hate others when ppl tell u dat u've changed. u back-fire em wit all sort of thgs, and u tend to drift way apart. sometimes, thgs u dat do hurt other ppl dat u jst 'buat tak tau je' wit the tot of 'bukan salah aku..', and u drift apart. and sometimes, u put urself down to the ground - confessing over thgs u never done, yet it left unattended.
but changes - is a part of life. u came to a new thg, u forget the whole old thang u used to hav. we r human being. we cant jst help dat.
and dis can help me ease the shyte in me.
and its.. fcuktastic!
lovin it. hehehe