Saturday, December 19, 2009

dinner, out.

cheesy pizza - its hot!

by 6pm - aku alrdy out of the house. i am off for a dinner wit an old fren of mine - TC. knew him way back in 2002 if i am not mistaken. a nice guy, can talk about anythg under the sky alrite. he was kinda free, and in Ipoh at time being - so i decided to giv it a shot by calling him up and askin out for a dinner - if he dun really mind. and yeah - he's ok wit it. so it goes. i refused to drive dis time around. i jst wanna scoot there - and i did. it was rainin a bit - jst a lil bit - but by the time aku reach there in Pengkalan (which is around 15min on scoot - longer i bet, if ur drivin), it aint rain at all. like - yeah - at all. heh.

it is nice to catch up wit TC again. we talked a lot - about most of the thang. he kept on pullin my legs, each time see me lookin at the phone. heh. had dinner in Pizza Hut and aku then decided to teman him doin a lil bit of shopping around in Tesco - the so-called pushing the trolley wit boht of us havin a verbal diarrhea, non shop. it was fun.. and a bit of coffee after dat, i callled it off the day. gotta be home, hit Mumu early for trow - i gotta be in Taiping; i am havin a health talk to giv as a part of my community service. i mght as well hit mum/dad's place trus since Monday - i gotta be up there.

erm - i gez life passes by, so fast. its almost scary. i remember woking up today and so-called realized i hav no idea of 'who i am' and 'wat i do'. sort of. my aspirations seem to slowly die down as i enter a realm of 'existence'. jst plain, simple existence. heh. however - i do not want to merely 'exist', i simply want to 'live' (of course) wit some purpose and drive.

but then - where do i find the purpose? and drive? spirituality? or may be i've buried myself wit denial and misery (dammit). i've entered the pits of shait and cannot climb out. or perhaps - actually; i am choosing not to climb out? *sigh* will i ever be truly happy again? innocent. and pure happiness?

again - i'd throw dat question into the void. i prefer not to crack my head over it. and i choose to procrastinate.

gnite ppl. gnite, love. and gnite Mr Void. i am sorry - for i keep on throwin shait to u. but i bet u understand.

No comments: