Wednesday, September 3, 2008

drama.

i gez drama is wonderful on the stage - and on the screen. but i cld be destructive in personal life. on stage - drama is emotional, expressive story played out by characters stuck in unfortunate situations. in real life - its different. it is a back-stabbin, nagging, he-said-she-siad tale dat holds back everyone involved - from enjoyin their own lives..


i used to crave drama in my life - a good great ones, indeed. not a day went by when i din suspect a 'fren' talkin behind my back. i wld be passive-aggressive for months and finally confront him, when i cldnt hold it in anymore. how cld he said dat about me or done dat to me despite everythg i did for him all these yrs? he wld fight back wit some harsh words and i wld retaliate wit, 'no, dat was not i meant when i said..' kinda thang. calls involving others, nasty emails and replies forwarded to others, numerous text msges later - i realized the frenship is over. i mean it - i got to get over dis, well. the signs had been there all along, it jst me who's so damn stupid, i jst cldnt accept it as it is. it took me yrs (again) to learn dat the sooner u can accept it and move on, the easier it is then.


when u gain 'the ability to let dat which does not matter truly slide', u no longer hav pretty drama in life. at least - dats wat i believe in. we dun like to admit dat we create the drama dat burdens our lives. its easier to simply claim bad thgs happen to me or 'drama is attracted to me' kinda thang. no, it is not. u can learn to ignore it and get back to yr own sweet life. it wasnt until i mad some really, really good frens dat i understood how drama impacted my past frenshps and relationships. i wld let other affect me - i allowed ppl who mattered not an ounce to; to completely ruin my days, wks, months by smthg triflin as a snide remark. it wasnt em who were the source of my troubles; it was my penchant for takin thgs personally.


now its pretty much 2nd-nature for me to ignore pettiness, meanness, shallowness and other such -vitiy from ppl who arent near and dear to me. if s'one wants to impart wisdom and frenliness - i welcum it wit open arms. otherwise, i'd jst smile and say ''g'day, sir/ma'am!" .. there r too many wonderful thgs in life i still hav to xperience and hav no time for the pettiness. so how do i avoid drama when its starin me rite in the face? i smile, maintain my posture and politely end the conversation - if i am strong enuff. in my head - its all over alrdy and quite painlessly if u think about it. no yellin, no breakin stuff, no vengeful acts. its like lookin at a crazy monkey in a cage at zoo and jst walkin past instead of standin there for hrs tryin to imitate it well.


yrs ago i was told, 'nvr fight wit a pig, u both get dirty and the pig likes it'. it sounds funny yeah. and it took me a long time to see the briliance in those words and even longer to actually live up to them. now dat i do - i gez life's much easier and stress-free.


drama belongs on the stage. not in my life.



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